All my life, I always thought being with someone, being attached brings out the best in me. Being attached half my life, I never knew how to be on my own.

I never knew how liberating solitude is. I've always feared solitude. I'm blood type A. We indulge in small constants. I've never knew how is it like to live alone. To live without depending on someone. To live without caring a damn for the rest of the world.

But now I know.

I never knew how liberating it can be to be on my own.

How it is a such an experience to be on your own. How we do not need to depend on another being to bring out the best in us. What it really means to be awesome by yourself. What it means to stay single and not be bitter with the rest of your friends on Facebook looking happily married.

It is ok to be single. It is ok to to indulge in yourself for a while.

Its ok to be single until you find someone who appreciates you for who you are. The good, the bad, everything that you are. it is ok.

AND if someone tries to change you, leave. It takes more effort to mask you really are. FIND SOMEONE who love you for you.

Dont let anyone change you.

When you finally walk out of it, you will then realise that you are missing a whole new exciting world outside.

Which might get me to where I actually want to get.

I'm glad I took so long to get over. I'm sure everything happens for a reason. :)

I gave u my prime. N now, I returned u yours. Enjoy it, because time is the only thing u cant take back once u give.

像个笨蛋，哭了一整晚。
难到就不可以快乐吗？
就不可以开心吗？
我相信可以。

我可以！

Tomorrow is a new day!

Rested the whole day today. Feeling sickly and under the weather. Suddenly all the cravings to eat crab, bkt, korean bbq. Wonder what's wrong with me. 

I wish there is something I can do to make these cravings, feelings and memories go away. 

They say time will heal. How much time will I need to stop my eyes from randomly tearing? How much time will I need to be ready to face the world? How much tears will I have to cry to not have one more drop left?

Well, guess there is no point worrying about how long it will take when I don't even know if I will be died tomorrow. Let's just take baby steps. Only worry about whats going to happen in the next 24 hours. Beyond that it's too long to plan. 

I'm contemplating of going to the gym or chilling out alone at a cafe after work. Which should I do? 

Hmmms. 

I guess it's over

But I can't let go.

Baby steps, let's  work towards being happy. My life is in my own hands. Happiness is a choice.